September 14, 2004
And Speaking of My Age...
...as we were, recently. If you'll remember.
Last week, I had to go to some lame school assembly for extra-curricular sports with Younger Step-Daughter, Case. Case recently entered the world of high school and will be playing soccer and badmitten. All other parents of said child were busy that night, so I had to go listen to "Blah blah blah good sportsmanship blah blah kids who play sports do better in school blah blah we have a great sports program blah blah blah."
Of course, being an ex-drama freak, all I could think of was, "Gee, if only the Concert Choir got as much funding, support and publicity as the football team." Bitter woman that I am. But that's not the point.
The point is, when we walked in, all the parents were handed a packet of materials, i.e. permission slip, rules of good conduct, whatever, I didn't read it. An attractive, younger woman, probably my age, was handing them out as we all filed past her into the gym. So I held out my hand, and she just gave me a look and handed one to the woman next to me.
Naturally, I'm thinking, "Oh, crap, did I steal her boyfriend in this very school 16 years ago?"
I just stood there with my hand out, and she goes, "Oh! You look good!"
Now I'm sure I stole her boyfriend, and she's trying to distract me while her sister is slashing my tires in the parking lot.
She finally handed me a packet and said, "I thought you were one of the students!"
YES!
I am a GODDESS! She thought I was ONE OF THE STUDENTS! I ROCK!
She had no grudge against me! I'd never even met her, which is why it was soooooooo easy for her to mistake me for a TEENAGER!
Of course, she could've just meant that I dress like crap, but since she was looking at my face and not my jeans and/or hoodie, I'm going with the whole I Look Half My Age thing.
I remained calm and gracious on the outside, while secretly doing my Happy Dance on the inside. It's somewhere between Snoopy's Suppertime Dance and a White Girl Club Dance, so you see why I kept it internal.
By the way, I'm wearing inappropriately-tight pants to work today. Eat your heart out.