July 22, 2005
H.M.S. VAGINA
Well, I got My 300th Comment on Monday morning, but it was apparently from someone named "buy valium online." So, as tempting as that sounded, I decided to wait until an actual human person was My 300th Commenter.
FUCKING SPAMMERS!!!
Ironically, My 300th Commenter turned out to be neither spammer nor actual human person, but the ridiculously sexy Queen of Ass herself! She commented on Wisconsin Scenery with:
How do THEY know he didn't leave me in charge? I thought that was a private conversation!
And for the record, I'm fairly comfortable with the thought of a world ruled by the Queen of Ass. And I'm also okee-dokee with the thought of bowing down before her in worship and adoration. I'm also hoping I'd be appointed Admiral of Her Royal Navy, but I don't want to assume.
Anyhoo, I would have preferred that the comment with which she achieved Pirate Wench fame was the one she posted in response to Ugh, There's That Word Again:
Okay. I totally LOVE the relationship you have with your boss, but more than that? The next time I have to go spread for the OBGYN, I'm totally gonna call you for moral support beforehand.
Because I love any excuse to write about VAGINAS, and because I will totally hold your hand and sing to you during your next vag-exam, Queenie!
But at least My 300th Commenter wasn't correcting my spelling, as so many of you have had to do lately, leading to much shame and, probably, my ultimate demise.
Point being, Her Royal Majesty has won the dubious honor of being able to ask me any question -- no matter how retarded or personal or vulgar -- and having it answered honestly by moi.
Ask away!
Comments
I'd be jealous, but I suppose I get enough attention here as it is?
Posted by: heather at July 25, 2005 11:19 AM
Oh. WOW! First of all? Admiral of the Royal Navy? That's TOTALLY you, girlie!
My question...hmmm...there are just so many possibilities here....and how to phrase it where there are actually many questions in one without being too obvious....
What is it that makes your toes curl, your ears ring, and eyes roll back more than anything else in the entire all-born put together world, and is it, indeed, something involving $ex? And if not, then pretend it is after you tell me what it is if it's not.
Capishe?
Posted by: Queen of Ass at July 25, 2005 01:20 PM