November 15, 2005
Sneeze On Me
When I was married to Mr. Raging Alcoholic, I could count on a sinus infection every November. And not just any sinus infection, nooooo. The kind of sinus infection that eventually travels to your ear, and then your brain, and makes your doctor yell, "Why did you wait so long to come in?!"
"I thought I just had a cold!"
"Your pain tolerance is too high -- I wouldn't have lasted 24 hours with this."
Of course, I see this as a badge of psychotic honor. I CAN TAKE THE PAIN, YA PUSSY!
There was also the stomach flu every spring, the summer cold, the winter cold... you see where I'm going with this? Stress is bad for your immune system, as scientifically documented in my blog.
But nowadays? Now that I don't have to worry about whether to pay the phone bill or buy groceries? Now that I don't have to bail anyone outta jail? Now that I no longer have to wonder why a couple Teamsters "owe us a favor?" I can't even work up a good case of the sniffles.
I have been well for faaaaaaaaar too long.
Oh, I've taken a few sick days this year, but mostly it's to go build a bear at Hot Topic. Or wherever. What was that store called again...? Or it's because I have a paltry headache. Not even a migraine -- just a my-ponytail-is-too-tight kind of headache. Took one day for P.M.S. But a good stretch where you come back and people act all concerned for your life, but they're really just trying to discern if you're still contageous? No such luck.
Every once in a while, I'll go to bed achy and with a sore throat, only to be good as new in the morning, dammit.
I want a day off! I have a brand spankin' new (and I do mean spankin') Xena DVD collection to watch! I wanna hang out on the couch in my new fleece jammies with little sheep on them! I wanna call into work and not have to use my fake scratchy-voice that no one is buying anyway!
I think I'm gonna go lick the faucet handles in the bathroom.
Comments
we only get 10 days off per year, at my company. they try to persuade us that this is a good thing, that we "get" to take these days for either sick time, OR vacation! personally, I think 2 weeks a year of vacation time is criminally deficient....
anyway, every month, my (male) boss takes a 'personal health" day to recharge - he never gets sick, but he claims that these 'phd's" are the reason why.
hell, we all want you to get your spankin' new dvd's taken care of!
Posted by: heather at November 15, 2005 03:09 PM
It tolls for thee
The panedmic is a comin - don't lick anything just yet
Posted by: qfe23 at November 15, 2005 07:21 PM
You've never heard of a mental health day?
Posted by: Matt at November 15, 2005 09:17 PM
You can come lick the girl-child. She's had a cold ever since school started. I need a sick day too to watch FireFly. Maybe I'll just give the kids some Benadryl and have them pass out all afternoon. Is that legal?
Posted by: Billi at November 16, 2005 02:42 PM
C'mon down! You can lick my faucet any old time.
Posted by: subtropic at November 16, 2005 08:02 PM