January 23, 2006
F-E-E-D, F-E-E-D-I-N-G, F-E-D,
Husband arrived home the other night around 6:00, Daisy's usual dinner time, and I came up from the basement to greet him and chit-chat while he changed clothes.
H: So, how was your day?
PW: Enh. Boring.
Daisy: [sits at Husband's feet and bores holes through his skull with her stare]
H: Um, did you F-E-E-D Daisy?
Daisy: [freaks out and starts doing her pony-dance, which is where she keeps her back feet on the floor and hops on her front feet because I don't know it's just what she does]
PW: Dude! Does she know what you just said?
Daisy: [stops dancing and looks at me]
H: I don't know. Maybeeeeeee... we should F-E-E-D her?
Daisy: [runs into the kitchen where we keep her food]
PW: Did you teach the dog to spell? NO TEACHING THE DOG TO SPELL! If we don't keep her ignorant, how are we supposed to oppress her?!
The next night, similar setting.
H:: Has Daisy been F-E-D?
Daisy: [stares blankly at the blank wall]
PW: No. And thank God she hasn't learned to conjugate.
H: Yeah, she starts conjugating verbs, and we're gonna have to put her to sleep.
Comments
Poor Daisy. What happens if she starts barking simple sentences?
Posted by: Queen of Ass at January 23, 2006 04:31 PM
Tell me about it, my dog learned French.
Posted by: Fresh at January 23, 2006 06:28 PM
Bark bark bark. Bark bark? Bark bark bark bark bark.
Bark bark bark.
Ruff.
Posted by: A. Dog at January 24, 2006 12:25 AM