November 12, 2006
Smoke Screen
There are a few things that have perplexed me from the minute I walked out of Head Boss' office last Monday morning, following my "inappropriate email" reaming:
Why aren't I fired?
Why aren't I at least on probation?
Why wasn't an H.R. rep at the meeting with something for me to sign, to be put into my permanant file?
The answer may surprise you...
BECAUSE THERE IS NO PROOF! The whole charge is bogus! Well, maybe not completely bogus -- we all know what an internet junkie I am -- but there's no hard evidence to back-up all of G.M.'s charges! He just made some good guesses based on what he sees when he walks past my desk.
The Facts [including some info I scrounged up in the I.T. department]
1. As a matter of habit, Nicholle deleted all her personal email the second she read it, and emptied her trash bin twice a day, during normal work hours. I know her well enough to know that, if she had screwed up, she would have copped to it immediately and apologized. But I also know her well enough to know that she was, indeed, religious about scouring her computer of personal stuff.
2. The company's computers are backed up once a day. Between 10:00 and 12:00 p.m. (it takes two hours). Whatever is on an employee's computer between ten and twelve that night gets backed up. Whatever has been deleted during the day is gone forever.
3. The back-up tapes are recycled every two weeks. Therefore, anything older than fourteen days old is gone forever.
4. In order to get one's hands on a back-up tape, one has to submit a request to the I.T. department. The I.T. department has received no such request from G.M. or anyone, regarding Nicholle's emails.
The Conclusion
G.M. only had access to whatever was on Nicholle's computer the day she left. I am 99.99% certain that my emails were not on her computer. If Nicholle accidentally missed one, it certainly wasn't one that encompassed everything that G.M. accused me of.
And while I am relieved to know that G.M. isn't privy to every aspect of my private life, these new revelations raise a whole new concern. Mainly, why am I being singled out for persecution?
The Crime
Since the simplest answer is usually the correct one, this is what I surmize:
A few days after Nicholle's last day, I sent her an email, from my work address, about getting together for lunch. And since I'm an idiot, I forgot to specify to send it to her Yahoo! account, so it went to her work account, which was still open.
Two minutes later, G.M. came by my desk and informed me of my mistake. I politely thanked him for pointing that out to me and silently thanked God that I had only mentioned lunch and not our mutual burning hatred of the man or our plans for world domination.
This was two months ago. I believe this incident planted a seed in his head, and it took him this long to perfect his plan. He's not the fastest search engine on the web.
The Motive
A year ago, our company went to a new system of timekeeping for hours worked by employees. It's on the internet, which caused a lot of confusion and panic for everyone here over the age of forty, especially Head Boss. But that's fine -- that's job security for me!
See, we all sign on and fill out our timecards, and then H.B. signs on his Special Super-Secret Wonder Twins Manager Account to review and approve them all. Except that he doesn't want to, and he travels quite extensively, too, and is often gone when approval time rolls around. So he gave me his password and told me to sign on a approve all the timecards.
Well, word got out that H.B. had given Power and Control and Authority to a mere staff support person -- and a woman at that! -- and G.M. went ballistic. Peons aren't supposed to perform managerial tasks! Even if the manager wants them to! It's FORBIDDEN!!!
And that, my friends, is why I believe G.M. has it in for me. Well, that and my generally blasé attitude...