June 11, 2007
Dynamic Diva
Husband and I had a pleasant surprise a couple weeks ago. A barn just landed in our laps. Luckily, it was empty at the time, so we weren't badly hurt.
Okay, seriously. You know how we wanna buy land up north and build a timberframe? (Thereby ensuring that I'll never, ever see Heather again.) Well, in the timberframing community, there are a very lucky few who get their hands on an old barn and salvage the vintage timbers.
(Oh, God, I just keep getting dorkier and dorkier.)
Such an opportunity has presented itself to us, and we may be able to buy a barn. It's in really great condition; none of the wood is rotting. If you were a Wood Nerd, like Husband, you'd know what a Chance-of-a-Lifetime this is.
But barns aren't cheap. So I reluctantly -- very, very reluctantly -- volunteered to go back to work to help make our wildest dream come true a little sooner.
(I just admitted that my wildest dream is an old, empty barn. Will no one commit a mercy killing?!)
Now, I haven't gone completely crazy. I'm only going to work parttime. As few hours as possible. After all, Stella isn't going to train herself!
I'm a little daunted by the prospect of having to go find a job. I've never had to go GET a job before. They've always just landed in my lap (like dinner, drinks and weed). I had to create a resume, which required me thinking waaaaaaaaaaaay, way back in time. It was like, 'Okay, where was I working before the accounting firm? Who was I dating then?'
That's the only time I can remember when anything happened. Who was I dating then? I could create a dating resume much easier than a work resume. However, it would be much less impressive.
Ever helpful, Heather said, "So. First job that comes to mind... fluffer on the set of Evil Dead IV."
Oh, IF ONLY.
But let's be honest -- we've all seen the Old Spice commercials. Bruce is too old to be kicking evil's ass anymore. At this point in his life, he'd probably rather just pay some neighbor kid to do it for him. Don't get me wrong; I'd still let him bend me over the back of his couch. But I probably wouldn't argue if he wanted to keep his shirt on.
So with that off the table, I'm considering a job as an assistant to our financial advisor. Yes, a job at the Home of the Frowny Face would mean much less of a commute, and they have been courting me.
However, our advisor's office is just a stone's throw away from a huge, upscale shopping mall. AND it has a Tiffany's and a Pottery Barn, unlike the huge, upscale shopping mall by my old job. It's totally an upward career move!
Plus -- and this is the real kicker -- he called me "dynamic." TWICE. I not only want to work for this guy, I want to run away with him! DYNAMIC!!! He knows me so well already!
I'm going back again this week to talk with some marketing guy he wants me to talk with. And more importantly, he's going to let me talk with one of the other assistants, so I'll have a very good idea of what I'm getting into.
Of course, there will still be a last-ditch effort to remain a kept woman, but, failing that, I think being part of my own, little Dynamic Duo is a good fallback position.
Comments
Um, I'm missing something here. You say you are going back to work to get money to buy an old barn. So far, that's cool, if not a little odd. But you are crowing over the fact that it is near an upscale shopping mall for you to spend all of your money at? I fail to see the logic here.
Oh, and don't forget the Coach store is there too.
Posted by: Marty at June 11, 2007 01:13 PM