June 15, 2007
Workin' Eight to One, What a Way to Make a Living
Oh, dear Christ, I have a job. You can all stop hating me now. I start Monday. My life is over. A little piece of my soul just died screaming.
I'll be working a grueling four days a week, five hours a day. I'll have Wednesdays off, so I can still have lunch with my Bitches. (You know who you are!)
Monday, I start three full days of training classes. I don't know how the hell I'm going to keep from nodding off for eight hours. But it's a good thing, the training -- considering I have no clue whatsoever about what I'm going to be doing. Seriously. I don't even know what my boss-to-be does. Something about... finances?
Come to think of it, what the hell did we talk about in those two interviews...?
Boss2B assured me I wouldn't have any trouble doing the job.
PW: I emailed you my resume, right?
B2B: Yeah, but I barely glanced at it.
PW: Dude! That took me HOURS to put together! You could have at least scanned it!
B2B: Oh, I'm sure you're qualified.
Why do I feel like Dolly Parton's character in "Nine to Five?" Hmmm, perhaps I can work that to my advantage. After all, I'll be just a hop, skip and a jump away from a Coach store and a Tiffany's. And I look so damn good when I hop, skip and/or jump...
Well, the woman I'm replacing got fired for internet usage. She was reading People magazine online every day. Personally, I would have fired her for bad taste. I mean, why read People when there's The Superficial and The Gilded Moose?
Anyhoo, it probably goes without saying that I won't be installing I.M. on my work computer. So no more Fucking with Heather in the mornings. Except on Wednesdays. No more googling Christian Bale. Or blogging. Or searching for the shoes to the vintage Barbie Little Red Riding Hood outfit on eBay.
What? They were only made for that one outfit and are really hard to find! Besides, you haven't seen naughty until you've seen a vintage brunette ponytail Barbie with scarlett lips in a blue Swiss polka dot dress, a black corset and a red, hooded robe. Scandalous!
Comments
Fuck. Now we can't go to garage sales on Fridays!
Guess we'll have to do lunch on Wed.
Snippy Bitch
Posted by: Snippy Bitch at June 15, 2007 11:49 AM
seriously? FIRED FOR INTERNET USAGE? what the hell? it's their fault for not giving her anything specific to do, I think...
Posted by: heather at June 15, 2007 02:37 PM
Taking a job that does not allow you to spend 80% of your time mindlessly surfing the internet is like setting yourself up for failure.
Posted by: Kelly Garrett at June 16, 2007 01:57 AM
Oh no! We'll miss your blogging... oh, wait, that's what the hours from 1pm forward are for.
Posted by: Mickey at June 16, 2007 02:27 AM
Congratudolences.
Posted by: Marty at June 17, 2007 08:12 PM