July 27, 2007
Souring On eBay
Dear Asshole Who Took a Month To Send Me My Watch,
If you're so busy running your huuuuuuuuuuuuge eBay business that you don't even have time to go to the goddamn post office once a week, then perhaps you shouldn't list so many items at one time? Just a little selling tip from me to you, Sparky. Perhaps you bit off more than you could chew with the Internet Get Rich Quick Scheme and should go back to selling insurance.
I don't even want the fucking watch now. And since you sent it after I sent four (unanswered) emails, and since the last one I sent you told you not to bother, I'm not dropping the complain I filed with PayPayl. So there. You suck.
* * * * *
Dear Skanks Who Are Bitching About Their Packages After One Week,
I don't know where you're fucking packages are. Ask your stupid mailman. Or better yet? Go smoke a bowl and mellow out. It's only been a week since the auction ended. And six days since you paid. And five days since I shipped it. And one of those days was a Sunday. Four days is awfully fast for getting your panties so tightly knotted that they're tugging on your pubes.
What do you think -- that I haven't mailed the packages, yet? That I want to keep this shit sitting around my house any longer than is absolutely necessary? Clue time! I'm doing this to get rid of my crap!
Check out my 100% positive feedback from 752 customers, and maybe learn that I'm not a spiteful ogre toying with what little money your husbands make down at the gas station, okay?
* * * * *
Dear Bitch Who Hasn't Paid Me,
Are you unclear on the concept of eBay? Here's a refresher -- you bid, you win, you pay. Reeeeeeeeaaaaaaal easy. Even a flat-headed simpleton like you should be able to figure it out.
I clearly state in my auctions, PAYMENT DUE WITHIN FIVE DAYS OF AUCTION END. You've doubled that period of time, and I've been more than patient, so how 'bout at least clearing all the cigarette ash and moon pie crumbs off your keyboard and answering one of my emails, huh?
* * * * *
Love (to lock you all in a closed car on a hot day),
Wenchie
Comments
And aren't we just going to have a time of it together?
Posted by: Kelly Garrett at July 27, 2007 06:10 PM
Is it me? Or do I sense a little tension/frustration here? Nah! Prolly just me. LOL
Good luck.
TG
Posted by: Tommy at July 29, 2007 01:13 AM