October 24, 2007
Rockin' the Ruffles
If you live anywhere in northern Illinois, you probably know this by now. But for my out-of-state friends...
I bought ruffled pirate underwear this weekend in Door County.
SEEEEEEEEEEEEE, Heatherrrrrrrrrrr! There IS something good in The Door!
Billi and Terri (Billi's neighbor and friend, and now my friend, too) dragged me into this boutique where the jeans were $168. And I was like, "A hundred and sixty-eight! These better make my ass look edible for that price!"
(Said the crazy lady who just spent $60 on a pair of sunglasses when Target sells perfectly good shades for $9.99.)
Remember that scene in "Grease" where Rizzo is in the bathroom at the drive-in with Marty, and she admits that she skipped a period? And then Marty blabs, and as they're walking back to the car, the gossip that Rizzo is preggo travels from car to car, so that by the time Rizzo gets back to Kenickie's car, he already knows?
That's not just cute movie shenanigans, people. It REALLY HAPPENS.
I was ready to leave the Door County House of $168 Jeans well before Billi and Terri, so I just stood by the door and tapped my foot. Until I noticed the display of ruffled panties. You know -- like the kind little girls wear under their Sunday dresses that provoke them to lift their dresses over their heads? Those panties!
I have been looking for those panties ever since I saw some hottie wearing them in Playboy. I think it was Drew Barrymore or Charisma Carpenter.
The ones I bought are black with little, white skull-n-crossbones on them. Hee! Soooooooooo cute!
At night in The Door, after they roll the sidewalks up, we basically just sat in our room watching non-cable t.v., doing our nails, eating fudge and thumbing through trashy magazines. We all called our husbands to say good-night, but whereas Billi and I were on the phone all of 2 minutes, Terri was on for like half an hour!
Her husband is very chatty, and he wanted to know what she bought. She was toying with the idea of going back and getting a pair of the same panties, so she told him that I bought them.
When she got off the phone, Billi called Brad, and the first thing he said was, "So I hear Wenchie bought some pirate panties."
People? No more than thirty seconds had lapsed since Terri hung up her phone and Billi dialed hers. Did Terri's husband lean out his window with a bullhorn or something?!
So, yeah, ruffled pirate panties. So cute on my ass that Terri and Billi each bought a pair. In different patterns, of course. Because no one's ass can rock pirate ruffles like the Wench's ass.
Comments
TTIWWoP!!!
(Oh, and I'm thinking that Brad and Terri's husband were in the throes of a torrid gay affair, and Terri called her husband while he was cuddling with Brad. Thus Brad heard about the panties. But that's just one man's opinion...)
Posted by: Marty at October 24, 2007 07:07 PM
Two comments:
1. Maybe Brad and Terri's husband were having a guys' night out, since you three were clearly having a girls' night out?
2. You'd better damn well post pictures. Preferably with your heinie in the ruffley panties.
Posted by: Mickey at October 25, 2007 12:14 PM