July 15, 2010
The Follow-Up Interview
Well. After Rose told me about Laura Miller being the physical manifestation of All That Stands In My Way, it seemed that everyone in the world wanted to chime in on what kind of person Laura is. I heard the words "inappropriate" and "lazy" a lot.
I also learned that, years ago, Laura used to work in the unit we've both applied to. She had no clue how to behave around the V.I.P.s that unit deals with on a daily basis. But it took "years of struggle" to get her transferred to a different department. Sadly, neither Steel nor WM were around during that era, so neither of them are aware of Laura's checkered past. Nor, apparently, did HR feel it their duty to inform anyone.
But after many bowls of ice cream and hours of t.v., I came to the zen-like acceptance that, if they aren't smart enough to hire me, than they are too stupid to deserve and appreciate the awesomeness that is me. Besides, who doesn't love a little bout of unemployment? I could finally paint the hallway...
Screw all that, Wenchie! Tell us how the second interview went!
Okay, my darlings, I hear you! The second interview was shorter and less formal... and AWESOME! I rocked their fucking socks off! It's like there were angels hovering around me, depositing the most PERFECT answers into my brain, so that I could put them forth with sincerity and charm.
First, they let me know that they're glad they have some prior knowledge of my work skills, because if they'd had to base their decision solely in my first interview, I wouldn't have gotten a second. And I know that sounds harsh, but it's fair. I gave a tragically shitty first interview, and they were probably nervous that I was easily intimidated. So I assured them that that was NOT the case.
"I know! That first interview was horrible, but I want you to know that that was the exception and not the rule. I don't even know who that person was. I don't get nervous around new people or really important people. I've met all the V.I.P.s and got along with them great. There will not be a repeat of that episode."
They seemed reassured and even commented that I seemed more like myself. And smiling. Apparently, I'm known for smiling a lot. But, Wenchie, you hate people. Why smile at them? Because smiling disarms people and, therefore, makes my life easier.
They asked what I would have done differently in the first interview, and I said that I would have thought of all my great answers actually during the interview, instead of two minutes after I left the interview room.
"There's one answer in particular that I'd like to ammend. It's the first one you asked me -- why I applied for the job. And yes, all the answers I gave then still stand. I still want more money; I still want a permanant position; and I still really like working with the people in this department. But there's another reason I forgot to mention. I have outgrown the Administrative Assistant position."
Can't you just see them salivating?
"I can be The World's Greatest Secretary with one hand tied behind my back, and it's just not enough anymore. I want more to do, more to learn, more responsibility. I want to move up to the next level. I am totally ready for this."
They grabbed their spoons and dug into that one! And it's totally TRUE! It's not like I was bullshitting them or anything. I've outgrown being a secretary like I've outgrown cheap make-up and crop t-shirts.
All their questions were really general, leading me to believe that they had no particular issue they're concerned about. Like -- what do you think this department thinks of you?
"They like me! I know they do because every, single one of them told me that I should apply for this job."
Pause for laugh.
"And I like them. There are some units that don't help each other out. But during the big events here, everyone in this unit pitches in and helps out and works together and has fun. I like being part of that, and I've always felt that I fit in really well here."
Oh, I lied -- they did ask me one specific question, but I think it was more about Steel's experience with a former employee than it was about me.
He asked, "Let's say that you had some sort of problem with me. Something I said or did offended you, or you didn't think it was right. Would you feel comfortable talking to me about it?"
"Well, I wouldn't feel comfortable, but I'd certainly talk to you about it anyway."
"Why?"
"Because I know you and would assume that any offense was unintentional, and I would want you to have the opportunity to tell your side of things. It's not good to let stuff like that fester. It can hurt your working relationship and affect the whole team."
Another homerun! And it's funny -- a year ago, I would have never thought myself capable of confronting a superior about his/her behavior. But I've come to expect respect from people, especially the ones I work for/with because they should know firsthand how much I deserve it.
I've had practice diplomatically reigning in PhD's occassional arrogant snottiness, so I'm well-equipped to handle fire-breathing dragons now. And Steel is no dragon.
Finally, they asked what part of the job description I think I'd have the most trouble with.
"The budget stuff. I've only recently started to become familiar with the way our budgets are structured. I haven't had to make any decisions, but Alpha has included me in discussions and meetings, so I'm learning. And if you threw me into budget planning, well, that just means I'd have to learn it in a hurry!"
"Anything else about the job description you want to ask us about?"
"I know that I'm supposed to ask you questions so you can see that I'm interested and thoughtful, but honestly? I know this job. This job is a compilation of the three jobs that I temped in for you guys. There's nothing about it that looks unfamiliar."
Are you ready? Because this is where the fat lady sang. This is where I brought in the pyrotechnics. This is what my guardian angel leaned over and whispered in my ear:
"I've been all over this department, and all over this organization. I've picked up new skills and new information everywhere I went. So for three years, I feel like I've been -- unknowingly -- training for this position. Everything I've done and learned has been leading me here. I feel like -- this is it. This is what it's all been about. This is where I'm supposed to be."
Cue the music... aaaaaand scene.
I didn't actually invoke God or the Holy Spirit or anything, but I think I implied it enough to really hit home with them.
Now. Will they hire me? I don't know. Laura Miller, I've heard, is out of the running, but there is one other person being considered. I think I have a good shot. A damn good shot.
But even if I don't get it, I've proved to myself that I can be a fantastic interviewee, and I've proved to Steel and WM that I am not a dithering idiot. Not bad for fifteen minutes of chit-chat, eh? And I did it all while on the first day of my period, which is pretty Herculean, considering I'd rather me under my desk in a fetal position.
After the interview, my friend J.A.B. (Jab! Hee!) told me to send a quick email thanking them both for their time. Brilliant! So I did -- thanked them for fitting me into their busy week and giving me another opportunity to prove myself.
I got the following reply from Steel: "You did well, Wenchie. I look forward to the future."
Holy crap! Are you thinking what I'm thinking?!
Comments
When you said everyone in your department encouraged you to apply for the job... you never once thought it was to be rid of you because they didn't like you?
;)
Posted by: Stacey at July 15, 2010 05:26 PM