July 20, 2010
With Sprinkles On Top
Last week, our ever-so-competent-and-helpful Management Dept. sent out the following email to our entire organization:
(Please note: we are in a complex of five buildings -- 6725, 6735, 6745, 6755, and 6765. We are in the 6765 building.)
Please be aware that today there will be an ice cream social in the east end of the complex, including 6725, 6735, and 6755 W. Road. Due to lack of funds, the 6765 building will not be participating.
I swear to God, people, that's a cut and paste.
The odd email left many things open to speculation. Why send the email if we can't participate? Wouldn't it be better just to leave us in the dark? Why dangle ice cream in front of us, only to let us know that we won't be getting any? Did they just want us know that, should we happen upon the ice cream, we were not allowed partake of it? And most importantly -- what kind of ice cream, and would there be toppings?
I was tempted to send the following email to the entire building:
Please note that today, there will be an ice cream social in the front of the building, including 6725, 6735 and 6755 W. Road. There will be sprinkles and chocolate sauce. We will also have live dancing bears and a couple of elephants on loan from Barnum & Bailey on the front lawn.We would ask that you not exit through the front of 6765 W. Road, as there will be a four-loop roller coaster positioned on the front lawn, along with the Notre Dame marching band performing their greatest hits for the W. Road addresses noted above. Following the ice-cream social, helicopter rides will be lifting off from the 6th level of the parking garage, including a whirl-wind tour of the lake front, before returning to the elephants and ice cream.
When you do exit the building, we want to apologize forthwith for having to step over the electric cables that are running to the bandstand, likewise positioned on the front lawn. Performing tonight will be Elton John and, (okay, this was going to be a surprise, but what the heck), the rockband U2.
Due to the cost of the event, however, we will not be participating in it. We did, however, want to let you know that it is taking place, so you are in no way hindered from exiting the building in a timely manner.
Instead, my Cool Lesbian Chick friend pooled her money with a few co-workers to buy ten boxes of ice cream sammiches, which they then shared with the entire company.
Now that's what Jeebus would do.
Comments
That's an AWESOME email you got! I just posted one and sent you notice. Is it something in the water at these places that makes people think it's okay to send this kind of crap out?
Posted by: Hope at July 20, 2010 03:17 PM
10 boxes of ice cream sammiches fed all FIVE buildings?
Posted by: Stacey at July 20, 2010 06:15 PM